Like a Fairytale
by VeritaParlata
Summary: While on vacation, Brenda and Dylan confront their painful past.
1. i

**Like a Fairytale**

Author: Verita Parlata

Rating: PG-13Characters/Pairings: Brenda/Dylan; minor mentions of other pairings.

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters from Beverly Hills, 90210.

Description: While on vacation, Brenda and Dylan confront their painful past.

Notes: Written for Ember1313's birthday. It's a little early since her birthday isn't until the 22nd, but…I don't think she'll mind. :D Her only request was that Brenda and Dylan be together. I hope I've delivered. This is my first story focusing entirely on Brenda/Dylan so...be kind to me. Happy Birthday, Sweets!

**Chapter I:**

_Worst vacation ever_, Brenda Walsh thought bitterly as she sat on the bench outside of her hotel. The night air was crisp and cold, and stung her cheeks. She resolutely refused to go back inside. At least, not until she calmed down enough to face her off again/on again (currently on again) boyfriend Dylan McKay.

Pulling the jacket tightly around her, she cursed. Leave it to her to suggest they come to Dublin during what would be classified as a 'not normal' winter season. Having come here before (work, of course) she knew the winters in Ireland were incredibly mild compared to the other parts of Europe. The fact that there was still snow and ice on the ground was the biggest indication of all. She thought for a mere second of running back inside to pull on her hat and then going for a long walk to simmer down, but the chance that she would run into Dylan in their suite was not one that she wanted to take.

Besides, it was what she gets for running out of the hotel restaurant in a huff after their conversation took a turn she didn't like.

She sighed again, looking out at the lights of the busy city, and told herself she had no right to be upset. She knew that when she and Dylan broke up five years ago he'd gone back to Beverly Hills and took up with Kelly Taylor again. It was one of the first things he told her when they started dating three years ago (after he broke up with Kelly, realizing that he still loved Brenda, and always would). She imagined that in the two years they dated, they took vacations and did the same things many couples did.

However, hearing him tell her that he and Kelly came to Dublin once before affected her in a way she hadn't expected. Especially after…what he said…she couldn't even bring herself to think about it. It was a horrible idea, just like this vacation.

Still, as much as she would like to blame all of her worries on Kelly Taylor and the past relationship she had with Dylan, truth was that she couldn't. The very real problems that she and Dylan faced were caused by her inordinate amount of fear. They've been through so much together. Shared a lifetime worth of pain that would have driven most couples apart (and, in fact, had driven them apart for a very long time), but she wasn't so sure they had it in them to handle more. She wasn't sure she could handle him walking out on her again.

"I think you might need this." It was Dylan. He stood in front of her and placed the floppy purple hat that matched her winter jacket on her head, taking care to pull the flaps down her ears.

"Thanks," Brenda mumbled, brushing the hair out of her face with her gloved hands. Dylan sat down beside her, his own jacket pulled tightly and black hat sitting snugly atop his head.

Neither of them said anything for at least two minutes. They simply sat there on the wooden bench in the cold dark as another light patch of snow began to fall. The silence was anything but comfortable with the two of them having much to say. Even so, no longer being those dramatic teenagers they were in high school, and having learned a few things since their last attempt at a relationship, both knew that these things take time.

That was the one thing they promised each other when they got back together. Time.

"We can't keep on like this, Bren," Dylan said quietly. His voice cut through the cold air that settled between them like a knife. Brenda didn't turn to face him, but knew he was looking at her. "We can't keep avoiding the past, and you can't keep running from me every time you get scared." In fact, that was the reason for this particular vacation. They'd resolved to try harder with each other.

"I know," she replied shakily. It amazed her that she could speak at all, given all the rampant emotions running through her. "I don't know why I got so upset when you said that you and Kelly came here." She shook her head slightly, a motion Dylan missed when he turned his gaze away. "I don't know…sometimes it feels like I can't escape Kelly no matter what I do." She glanced at him briefly, then quickly away when she found his dark eyes watching at her. "I know it's not fair to you."

"No," he agreed. "But I understand." Of course he understood. He was the prick that ran back home to her when things between him and Brenda got really tough. That action still haunts him. It was too much like Jack McKay for his liking. Too much like Iris.

Absently, he reached for her gloved hand and held it in his. He tugged at her hand gently so that she would turn to face him. "You don't have to worry about competing with Kelly, or feeling like you're second best to anyone." He tilted her chin with his free gloved hand. "I love you. I'm _in_ love with you."

A small smile tugged at the corners of her mouth. "I know," she admitted softly. "And I'm in love with you, too."

"Good, because I meant what I said. I think we should participate in the Hand-Fasting Ceremony being held here."

He felt her tense then she pulled her hand away gently and turned away from him. "Dylan…" she began in idle protest.

Ah...so there was the real problem. "I want you to marry me, Brenda."

"And this lame-ass proposal is your way of showing it?" She quirked an eyebrow.

He knew she was joking, but his face held no amusement. "I'm serious."

"I know…and that scares me." She stared off into the night. The twinkling lights in the distance not enough to distract her anymore. "We've been through so much…and some of it still hurts."

Defeated, but only for the moment, Dylan nodded. He understood without her saying another word why she was hesitant to marry him. A cold gust of wind blew over them, and he shivered violently.

"Okay, I love you, honey, and I want to talk about this, but I'm freezing my ass off out here." He stood and held out a hand for her. "Let's go inside."

Brenda looked up at him sheepishly. Almost like a child with a bad secret to tell. "I twisted my ankle coming out here." She pouted.

Dylan chuckled and shook his head. "So much for skiing then," he joked. "Even though they said this might all be melted by tomorrow. They have some crazy winters here." He hunched down and helped her up.

When she started forward, holding on to him for support, he bent down and scooped her up into his arms easily.

"Dylan!" she yelped with surprise, and a large grin split her face. "Put me down. There could still be some ice on the ground, and you might slip and fall. Then we'll both be stuck in bed the entire trip."

He waggled his eyebrows suggestively. "You say that like it's a bad thing."

He started for the door slowly, no greater feeling than carrying his beloved in his arms.

* * *

There was already a fire going in their suite when they came back inside. Brenda guessed someone on the hotel's staff did it while they were outside in the snow. She knew for certain it was one of the staff when she saw the tray of cheeses and fruits and drinks of cider left on the table.

She loved this hotel even more now. They really knew how to treat their guests.

Dylan, who carried her the entire way, only putting her down when they got into the semi-crowded elevator, placed her gently on the bed. They shrugged out of their coats and hats, discarded their gloves, then Dylan carefully pulled off her boots. He took extra care with the ankle she said she hurt, and looked at it carefully.

"I don't think it's a sprain, it's not swelling at all. It's not even bruised." He lifted the ankle to his lips and pressed a tender kiss to the skin. Brenda smiled warmly, feeling loved completely.

He stood once again to remove his own boots and then brought the trays to the bed for her to nibble on. He excused himself for a moment and with a moment alone to think, Brenda realized she was wrong to doubt his love for her. They were no longer the people they used to be. They've changed, grown separately as individuals that complimented each other even more now than when they were kids.

Dylan emerged from the bathroom wearing the pajamas she'd bought for him specifically for the trip. She laughed loudly, and joyously. Dylan McKay was _not_ a pajama-wearer by any stretch of the imagination.

"Very nice," she teased. The red and green flannel complimented his complexion, but that's all. She could imagine he was hot in them, given the heating in the suite and the fire roaring a few feet away. She laughed more when he started for her, modeling them along the way.

He stopped in front of her, giving her a lecherous grin and then reached for the hem of her shirt. Tugging it off her body, he tossed it away behind him.

"I know you don't have any pajamas as cool as these," he said while helping her to her feet. His fingers fell to the snaps of her jeans. He unbuttoned and unzipped them in a matter of seconds, then he pushed them down her hips, exposing the pale white flesh underneath, and she shimmied out of them. "but I figure you can wear the top, and I'll wear the bottoms." His lips found the sensitive skin on her collarbone, and she whimpered.

Her hands reached out to touch the skin he bared when he pulled the pajama top off. Her lips fused to his in a hot-blooded kiss. Then, suddenly, she felt the warmth of the fabric against her back. Brenda let her arms dangle so Dylan could pull the sleeves over them.

"We match now," she said with a smile while he buttoned the shirt.

"We always did," he told her, then kissed her forehead gently.


	2. ii

**Author's note: **Did I forget to mention that I've completed the entire story? ;P The rest to be posted as soon as it's edited.

* * *

**Chapter II**

Brenda awoke the next morning with the sun shining brightly on her face. The bit of warmth against her skin felt just as lovely as the flannel pajama shirt of Dylan's she still wore and the thick downy covers that were on the bed.

She stretched her body like languorously before even opening her eyes. Last night had been wonderful. She couldn't have asked for a better first night to their vacation, even after the fight she caused.

They'd stayed up practically all night talking, remembering the past (some things still left unsaid, but probably best as it was too painful for both), joking and enjoying being together. Even though they live together in London, neither of them have the time to lounge in bed and talk all night. The performances for the Royal Shakespeare Company were on a hectic time schedule and owning and operating _one _restaurant in London is a full-time job, Brenda couldn't imagine how Dylan operated three simultaneously.

When they did have a chance to be together for more than six hours, they usually ended up having sex or going out with friends. Brenda can see now how that only perpetuated their cycle of not talking. _Why talk when you can go have fun and pretend the problems you face don't really exist?_

That was why his marriage proposal frightened her so much. In order to be married, they would have to come to terms with their painful past. They would have to confront it head on and deal with it. Brenda wasn't so sure she could do that. Wasn't so sure she wanted to relive the worst experience of her life.

Determined to not let the bad thoughts ruin her mood, and hopeful that she's staved off his desire to get married (at least for the time being), Brenda reached to the other side of the bed for Dylan. She opened her eyes slowly when she felt that side empty and found a note written in Dylan's distinctive penmanship and a beautiful red rose on his pillow.

Smiling even winder now, if not a bit confused, Brenda sat upright in the bed. She picked up the rose and note, smelling the rose first before reading what the note said.

_"Gone to get breakfast, Beautiful. Get up and get dressed after reading this. I have a surprise for you. I love you."_

She figured he was up to something since they could have just ordered room service. Buzzing with excitement for whatever surprise he had in store for her, she climbed off the bed and headed for the shower.

Dylan was back by the time she emerged back into the suite wearing nothing but a towel. Seated in one of the chairs at the table, he looked up from the newspaper he was reading with a smile on his face, and a lascivious look in his eyes. Brenda was sure her looks matched his. He looked incredibly yummy wearing that brown turtleneck and those dark blue jeans. His boots were off and over by the fireplace. The tips were covered in snow, telling her that it hadn't melted like everyone thought it would. She was glad for having blow dried her hair now

"I'll be dressed in a second then we can go," she said and crossed the distance to kiss him. He cupped the back of her head to hold her in place for a longer kiss. They parted reluctantly with smiles, and no less desire running through either of them. She suspected his surprise meant a lot to him if he opted not to make love right then. That only seemed to make her even more excited now.

"Take your time," he told her, folding the paper back and setting it down beside the domed food dishes. "Besides, we should have breakfast first since we're going to be gone all day."

"Ooh," she exaggerated the word with the excitement she felt. Smiling so much now she thought her face would start to hurt. "Where are we going?"

"Better question would be where _aren't_ we going," he replied with a waggle of his eyebrows. "Last night we said that neither of us got to see much of Dublin our last respective visits so…" His voice trailed off when she dropped the towel and went about putting lotion on her body. "I figured why not see everything."

Somewhere in the back of his mind he remembers her telling him that because her skin is so pale, it chaps easily in the winter. She'd learned that that hard way growing up in Minnesota. He remembers that, yet all he can see are the patches of pale skin he's like to get his hands on. God, would he always want her this much? He couldn't imagine not.

It takes Brenda only a few minutes to get dressed: jeans, a black turtleneck sweater and thick socks. Then she's sitting down in the chair opposite him. She looks up at him with a smile. He's staring at her in a weird way, but she doesn't think anything of it. He's probably got something cooked up when they leave that will take her breath away and he's anxious.

Dismissing it, she reaches for the top of her food's cover and pulls it off. The red velvet box sitting open, displaying the large diamond ring in lieu of the food she was expecting takes her by surprise. She stares at the ring for a long moment, a lot longer than she expected to, but it's so beautiful and the way the sun shines against the diamond makes it look other worldly. Never, ever in her life did she imagine that she would see anything so beautiful. That anyone would ever love her enough to give her something so breathtakingly gorgeous.

"Did you know that Ireland has some of the best diamonds in the world?" Dylan asked casually. He smiled at her stunned expression. "Who knew?"

It takes Brenda another minute to find her voice. When she does, it still sounds odd to her ears. "Dylan," she begins with a breathy timber. Tears sting her eyes. "It's beautiful."

He's at her side in mere seconds. Kneeling before her and looking up at her reverently. He looks at her like she's more beautiful than anything else in the world. And she is. She's the most beautiful creature in his world and he would just die if she didn't become his wife.

He picked up the ring out of the box and Brenda can see that it has two smaller diamonds on either side of the larger diamond in the middle. It's still sparkling in the sun and looking other-worldly and she feels now like she's going to cry at any moment.

"I know that we still have things to discuss and overcome," Dylan began, his own voice resonating with a deep emotional timber. "But…I couldn't love you more if I tried. I wouldn't change one single thing about our past because it makes us who we are now."

Brenda touched his face lovingly, aware that she was now in fact crying. He took her hand gently in his and placed the ring on her finger. It looked more lovely against her pale skin than it did in the box. Never, ever had Brenda imagined she'd have someone love her this much.

"I'm hoping," he began again, his dark eyes looking lovingly into her. Dylan felt his heart thundering in his chest. Whether she said yes or no, whether they participated in the hand-fasting ceremony or not, he knew for certain, without any doubt and hesitation that he would love this woman for the rest of his life. "…that this makes up for my 'lame-ass' proposal…" They both laughed at that. "…last night. And if you don't want to get married now, I understand. I just…" he sighed, sure that he was making a complete fool of himself. "I want you to be my wife, Brenda….someday."

Unable to do much else, Brenda bent down and kissed him soundly. Never ever had she expected someone to love her this much. But she'd hoped…


	3. iii

**Author's note: **If you have never been to Ireland, I suggest you go. It's really one of the most _beautiful_ places on earth. I hardly did it justice.

* * *

**Chapter III**

It was late afternoon when they finally stopped at one of the many restaurants in the shopping district. When they'd left the suite, after finally having some breakfast, she'd been surprised to see the horse-drawn carriage waiting for them outside. The white-mane, white-hoofed horse looked majestic against the snowy backdrop of Dublin. It reminded her of the carriages in New York, but the experience was somehow better. This was shared with Dylan.

The trotted slowly through the city, stopping to see the many sights and take pictures to remember the trip. Not that either of them was going to forget this trip anytime soon or…ever. They toured the Dublin Castle, admired the Spire of Dublin, and watched the children play in the snow at St. Stephen's Green park.

Then, much to Brenda's delight, they retired the carriage and went to the shopping district. She bought presents for Brandon and her parents, a few friends in London while Dylan bought just a few trinkets he thought Iris and Erica would love. Dylan hadn't seen Erica in about as long as she hadn't seen Brandon and the separation was killing him. It was different for her, being that she and Brandon were twins. They were always together (quite eerily) in their heads. All Brenda had to do was think of Brandon and the phone would ring. He'd be on the other end of the line telling her how much he missed her.

Dylan didn't get enough of an opportunity to talk to Erica. She was away at school and Dylan was always busy with the restaurants. She wondered how it would affect all of them if they got married alone.

Dylan took a bite of his food and looked as if he were in total bliss. Brenda smiled, mostly to herself. She'd never pegged him for a food critic (or lover - mostly pegged him as only eating to preserve his life).

"Good dish?" she asked before sipping her cocoa. She cradled the warm cup in her hands.

"Oh, yeah." He held out a piece for her to try. She did, and had the same reaction as he did. "I'm thinking of having Pierre come here and take lessons now that I've tasted this. I think Isles could use a dish like this."

She smiled at that. Dylan treated his first restaurant like it was his child. He was always sending his head chef Pierre off to exotic locales to learn to prepare new dishes. More than anything, she smiled at the responsibility he shouldered. Dylan had always risen to the occasion. Had always born more than anyone should be allowed, but he was different now. All traces of the teenager she first fell in love with were gone and she was now faced with this handsome, incredible and loving man.

She wondered if she'd changed half as much as he had.

When their meal was over and the bill paid (their bodies rested from their sight-seeing), they left and decided to walk back to the hotel. Hand in hand, carrying their bags of gifts, they walked the snow filled streets of Dublin.

"I like it here," Dylan told her. "It's peaceful."

Brenda chuckled, brushing hair out of her face. "Yeah, it is, compared to Beverly Hills and London."

"Do you think about Beverly Hills often?" he asked too casually. "All of our old friends back home?"

"More often than I care to admit," Brenda replied.

It was true, she did think of them often, and it usually wasn't a good thought. She often thought of going back and rubbing all of her success in their faces. Of showing them all that she's made something of herself and did it without being classified as _'Brandon Walsh's sister'_. She is a headlining actress who appeared on Broadway and prestigious venues around the world…and yet, still sometimes she found herself still feeling like that insecure teenager who had to live up to her brother's example.

"Do you?" she asked after they grew silent. She could tell he was thinking of something he didn't want to share. Holding back some detail afraid of how she would react.

"Sometimes," he said softly. "Sometimes I think of the prick I used to be and it makes me sick."

She felt his body tense, and his hand gripped hers tightly.

"I think of all the crap I did and…" He stopped her just outside the entrance to another park. It was growing dark outside, evening settling upon them, and the air was cooler than it had been. "When we broke up five years ago and I left you in London, I ran straight back to Beverly Hill and fell into my old ways. I…"

Her fingers upon his lips stopped his words. "You're not that same man, Dylan. If I thought you were, the three years that we've just spent together wouldn't have happened."

"I hurt you…I left you when you needed me the most. That's not was a man does. Not a good man." Tears slipped down his cheeks, and Brenda felt her own stinging her eyes. They had only talked about this once when after they found each other again. Painful as it had been then, it was just as painful now. Bitter emotions have a way of sticking with you no matter how much you change.

"You _are_ a good man," Brenda told him resolutely. "You would have been there for me if you could…if I had let you." Dylan wiped away her tears. "But since we've been back together…I know that I've put you through the ringer and we don't always have time to spend together…but… I hope you know that I don't blame you. And I don't hold it against you for living your life after we broke up. Despite my behavior last night." She tried a smile.

"I never meant to hurt you, Brenda," he whispered pulling her closer. His lips touched hers in a light, feathery kiss that intended to show her a small portion of what he was feeling.

"I know," she replied with a whisper of her own. She shivered when the wind blew once more. "Now let's go. I'm freezing." She started off and tugged his hand to pull him along.

* * *

The fire was roaring again when they got back to the suite. The walk was a lot longer than they anticipated and both were too tired, and too full from their late lunch to go to the dining room for dinner.

Instead, they camped out in front of the fireplace with the cheese and fruit spreads, and the delicious apple cider. Brenda laid with her head in Dylan's lap. The fingers of one hand entwined in her dark hair while the other held up the book he was reading aloud to her. Her hands were tucked under her as she listened to him reading _The_ _Princess Bride._

She hadn't read that book in years, not since she was a child, and it surprised her when Dylan insisted they buy it from the bookstore they went in to.

Just when Dylan reached the part where Princess Buttercup realized that her long lost love Westley did indeed return to her, Brenda shot up from her position. Dylan looked at her concerned, wondering of something was wrong.

"What's wrong?" he asked, after finally seeing the look on her face. He put the book down and turned slightly to face her.

Brenda ran a hand through her dark hair and sighed. She wasn't sure where the thought came from, she never was when they were on this subject, they always just washed over her. She was powerless to fight them sometimes. She couldn't always bury them in the back of her mind and blaze on by concentrating on something else.

When tears began to fall without warning, Dylan grew even more concerned.

"Bren, what is it, honey?" He reached out to wipe away her tears, then gently caressed her face. "Please tell me."

"Do you think about the baby we lost?" she asked, her voice quavering and unsteady. Indeed, she felt sick. This was the source of her heartache and fear.

"Every single day," he answered gravely.

She locked eyes with him sadly. "Earlier…on the way back, you were telling me…" When he looked as if he were going to interrupt her, she said, "No, please, Dylan…I need to say this." He nodded and let her continue. "Earlier, you said that you fell into your old ways when you went back home. You told me once before that it was the only way you could cope. That…" She was at a loss for words, and let out a shaky breath. "That you left me when I needed you the most, but that's not entirely true. I left you, too."

She sighed, the air burning like acid in her lungs and the pain in her heart feeling very real.

"When I lost our son…I pushed you away. I blamed you unfairly because I didn't want to blame myself. I blamed you because it was easier than mourning him. I pushed you away when we needed each other and I'm sorry for that."

"Shh," Dylan commanded. He pulled her into a tight hug and let her cry against his shoulder. Her body shook violently as the sobs poured through her and he felt his own warm tears falling down his face. "I don't blame you for how you were feeling. I knew you were in pain and I wanted to help you but I couldn't. You may have pushed me away but I'm the one who left. I'm the one who ran away because I couldn't face what I did."

She pulled back to look into his teary eyes. "You weren't responsible for the car accident, Dylan. I was the one driving."

"But you wouldn't have even been out of the house that late if I hadn't called you to come get me because I _had_ been drinking. I shouldn't have been drinking at all, I was just so…mad at Iris and…that's no excuse. You were tired and you shouldn't have been driving."

Dylan didn't think he'd ever said those words aloud. Didn't think in the past five years he's allowed himself to confront those demons that haunt him. He, too, could hardly escape the thoughts of the son he and Brenda lost. He'd been so consumed with guilt at what he'd done that when Brenda pushed him away, he felt oddly relieved. He was happy that she blamed him since he blamed himself.

"The police determined that the other driver was at fault," she told him. She'd never told him that before, not even when they got back together. She wasn't sure what good it would have done and now she could see that was a mistake. They both blamed themselves, and they both needed the closure.

"They were intoxicated eight times over the limit and would have had an accident regardless. We just happened to be there at that time." She shook her head. "I never once thought that you blamed yourself. I was too wrapped up in blaming _myself_ that I didn't even consider you." She wiped away his tears gently, as he had done hers. "I should have told you before. I'm sorry."

"Did you ever tell anyone about the baby?"

"Brandon," she answered. "But I think he knew something was wrong anyway. Twins and all. He'd left five messages, all of them full of worry, on the answering machine when we got back from the hospital." She inhaled sharply, relieved to feel that a weight had been lifted.

When she'd gone to counseling after miscarrying, the therapist suggested she talk to someone about the loss. Brenda hadn't listened. Determined to put this all behind her in her own fashion, she never considered the damage she'd been doing to herself by holding on so tightly.

"He flew out to see me after you'd gone back home. Stayed with me for a while…as long as he could given that demanding job he has." She smiled sheepishly. "It was the first time we'd been together that long since I'd moved to London."

"I'm glad he was there for you," Dylan said softly, and he meant it. "I'm glad you had someone."

"I could have had you if I'd just…" The tears threatened to fall. "I held on to you so tightly even after you were gone though. Even when I wanted to forget you. I tried to forget you."

"I did, too. And that's why Kelly and I didn't work out. She knew that something had happened between us and I was using her to get over it." Dylan admitted, feeling now, too, like a weight had been lifted from him. "The trip here was her way of trying to get us past whatever my issues were with you, but…we spent the whole trip fighting. She finally couldn't take it anymore and left me here."

"That's horrible," Brenda supplied with a laugh.

"I deserved it," he replied with a smirk. "I knew then what I knew in high school."

"What's that?"

"That you're the only one for me." Smiling at the sentiment, Brenda reach out and grabbed his hand. Dylan wasted no time in pulling that hand to his lips and kissing it. "No matter what we go through and who comes into our lives…" He thumbed the diamond ring he'd placed on her finger hours before. "…my heart will always belong to you."

Still smiling, and feeling happier than she has in a long time, Brenda pressed her lips against his in a sweet kiss.

They didn't make love that night either, but slept peacefully for the first time in years.


	4. iv

**Author's note: **It's a darn, crying shame that I'm so close to the end in posting this. It was fun to write. Touched all the right emotions with me. I'm also quite sure that I fudged up some of the pagan rituals...just consider it my way of taking poetic license.

* * *

**Chapter IV**

It was five in the evening when Brenda went downstairs to place a long distance call. She and Dylan didn't do much today since it was practically freezing and they'd gotten up at almost noon.

She whispered a thank you to the hotel clerk who handed her the calling card and proceeded to dial the number. It wasn't until after she dialed the number did she realize how early it probably was in Beverly Hills. Still, being a Saturday, she was sure her brother was awake, even if it was only nine in the morning.

He picked up on the third ring, his voice sounding full of sleep. "Hello?"

"Hello, brother," Brenda said cheerily, mostly because she knew it would get on his nerves. She heard some rustling and a muffled voice then the door closing. He must have still been in bed.

"Hey, Bren," Brandon greeted her properly this time, his voice sounding more excited than previously before. "How's Dublin?"

"It's beautiful. Unfortunately, Dylan and I decided to come when they're having a freak winter and it's actually cold." She couldn't explain the warmth that went through her at her brother's laugh. She really missed him. "How's Andrea? I hope I didn't wake her."

"Nah, she was awake. She's good. Doctor says if she doesn't deliver within the next few days he's going to induce."

"I see my niece is still being difficult."

"No, your _nephew_ is still being difficult," he corrected, certain that he was having a son and still upset with his wife for not allowing him to find out the sex. "Hannah is busting with joy. She can't wait to be a big sister."

"Remind me to tell her how awful brothers can be when I come to visit."

Brandon laughed sarcastically. "She can't wait to see her Aunt Brenda anyway." Silence for a beat as Brandon informed Hannah that her favorite cereal was on the shelf. "Sorry," he apologized. "So when can I expect you? Hannah's not the only one who can't wait to see you."

Brenda smiled against the phone. "Should be soon. I've received a couple of scripts for some movies out that way that are decent enough. And Dylan wants to see Iris. He hasn't since she moved back. Besides, I have to come and spoil the newest Walsh something fierce."

"You are not to spoil my children, Brenda Walsh. That computer you bought for Hannah was enough to last a few years."

"I hope you know this is going in one ear and out the other, brother," she told him casually.

"I have no doubt." She could almost see him rolling his eyes. "So, what's up? You just calling to check in? You sounded kind of…sad…through your cheeriness."

"It should be criminal the way we know each other."

"Twins, Brenda," he reminded her. "Out with it."

"Dylan and I talked about the baby we lost last night."

She felt him tense through the phone. "How'd that go?"

"We're still in Dublin together, so good, I guess." That wasn't fair. "No, it went well. We needed to talk about it. We really hadn't these three years…and…it was good."

"That's great. I'm glad you guys are moving forward."

She chuckled. "Always faithful in our love, huh?"

"Always faithful that neither of you would ever love anyone else the way you love each other," he corrected. Hesitated a moment before continuing. "Something else bothering you?"

"No, no," Brenda replied, fingering the ring on her finger. Admiring the beauty and noticing how perfect it looked on her finger. "I'm good. For the first time in a really long time, I'm good. I feel like…a whole person again. Like I've changed."

"You have," Brandon assured her. "You've matured into a confident, vibrant and loving woman. One who's not perfect and no longer tries to be. You're comfortable with your life, Bren. It's a good thing."

Brenda remembered now why she called her brother in the first place, and how happy she was for doing so. "You always know the right thing to say."

"Of course. A part from being a genius, I'm very good with the words."

Brenda laughed and rolled her eyes. Out the corner of her eye, she saw couples walking hand in hand to the dining room. The dining room itself was elaborately decorated with soft gold and white. Flowers adorned every table and practically every surface that sturdy enough to support the weight. Outside the door to the dining room she saw a sign that welcomed the participants in tomorrow's hand-fasting ceremony.

"Okay, genius who is very good with words, I have to go now. I just wanted to hear my best friend's voice."

"Aww, you missed me," Brandon teased, even though he missed her, too.

She chuckled again. "Give Andrea, Hannah and the baby my love. I'll see you, soon. I love you, Brandon."

"I love you, too," was the last thing her twin said before they both hung up.

With his words of how much she's changed ringing in her ears, Brenda went to the desk to speak to the clerk who helped her before. The pretty woman looked up with a smile.

"How can I help you, Miss Walsh?"

"I'm curious about the ceremony that's taking place here tomorrow. Can you tell me what it's about?"

The woman beamed so brightly, her smile rivaled the sun. "Of course! We hold the ceremony once a year on the day of the Winter Solstice. Most of the couples who participate are either already legally married and renewing their vows in a traditional Pagan way or are new couples who are not overly religious, at least not in the organized church sense, and want to be bound together as husband and wife." She paused to take a breath. "Is this something you and Mr. McKay would be interested in participating in?"

"Yes," Brenda answered honestly, not needing a moment to consider it. She was certain now that she wanted to be his wife. "But we don't have a marriage license. Would that be a problem?"

The clerk smiled just as brightly as before. "Not at all."

* * *

"How was Brandon?" Dylan asked when Brenda walked into the their suite. He looked up from the book he was reading and noted the large garments bags she carried. "What's all this?"

"Brandon's fine," she answered; ignoring his second question, she laid the garment bags down on the bed, and placed the other bags at the foot off the bed. "He sends his love and demands that none of the things we bough be for his children."

Dylan laughed. "I'm sure you told him there was no chance of that happening."

She made a non-committal sound. And sat down on the other side of the bed. "He knew it without me having to say so."

Dylan laughed and watched her suspiciously. He could always tell when his girlfriend (fiancée) had something up her sleeve. Her poker face was terrible.

"So…what's in the bags?"

"Oh, some stuff for me and some stuff for you," she answered, trying to sound cryptic and coming across as giddy.

"What stuff?" he asked slowly, unsure of really wanting to know in case it was another pair of pajamas.

With a small smile, Brenda pulled up the garment bag she placed in front of him. Unzipping it with flourish and a _tah-dah _at the end, she pulled out a plain white suit and shirt. There was a creamy gold colored tie hanging on top of the crisp white shirt.

"It's a little plain to look at on the hanger, but I think it will just have to do on such short notice."

Dylan looked from the suit to her and back again twice, coming up confused as to why he would even need a suit. "Okay," he laughed shortly. "What's the suit for?"

Brenda's face was the picture of innocence when she said, "Well you're going to need something to wear when you marry me tomorrow afternoon. Apparently both the bride and groom are required to wear white at these rituals."

Dylan continued to look at her as if she'd grown a second head.

"Okay, what?"

"Honestly, Dylan, it was your idea to participate in the hand-fasting ceremony and now, you don't want to?" She _tsked_ at him and she laid the suit down with care. "Try to pull together your participation at a mass wedding on such short notice and the groom still doesn't want to cooperate."

Her boyfriend's eyes narrowed into dangerous slits. She could see the beginnings of a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth, but he was still confused.

"I thought you didn't want to participate? I thought you had reservations about becoming my wife?" He asked, but there was no amusement in his voice or eyes.

"I did," she replied honestly. "But I don't anymore."

Dylan opened his mouth to say something and then closed it just as abruptly. His brain was working faster than his mouth could catch up to.

"Okay, what happened between you leaving this room to go call your brother and deciding you want to get married in a Pagan ritual?"

"We happened," she answered, again, honestly. "You and I came here and we faced everything we needed to face." She reached for his hand. "We came together, for the first time since we've been back together, and it proved to me that I've changed. That I'm worthy of you."

"Wait, Bren…"

"That we're worthy of each other. That we can face and get through anything as long as we talk to each other and not run away. It's you that changed my mind, Dylan. It's what you've been saying all along. I want to be your wife, Dylan McKay. I want to wear your ring and have you wear mine."

Willing to accept her words for truth, Dylan smiled. When he finally allowed himself to think about it, he realized he was happy. This was what he wanted. To be married to Brenda and spend the rest of his life loving her and making her happy. The thought not only excited him, but warmed him inside and out.

Then, a thought dawned on him. "But we don't have a marriage license. Or rings." His face fell a little, but Brenda only smiled.

"Turns out, we don't really need a license to participate. The hand-fasting is symbolic. Besides, we can always get a license after or wait until we get back to London. And…" She shot up quickly to pull a smaller bag out of the larger bags she left at the foot of the bed. Walking instead to sit on his lap rather than back to her side of the bed, she pulled out a red velvet box and opened it to the large silver diamond encrusted wedding bands. She felt something inside of him melt, and likened him to be feeling much like she had yesterday when she received her ring. "I hope you like what I've picked out."

"They're beautiful," Dylan said, his voice low and verging on quivering. He kissed her lips softly, taking the box from her hands and appraising the rings. Another thought occurred. "What about your dress?" His eyes glanced to the garment bag.

"It's downstairs being worked on," she replied. "You really think I'd pick out a suit for you and not get my own wedding dress." She rolled her eyes and Dylan tickled her side. "It should be ready by tomorrow morning. Perfect timing for the evening ceremony."

"You've thought of everything," Dylan joked. His smile was wide and toothy and full of the type of joy she hadn't seen in him in a really long time. Happiness agreed with them. It looked wonderful on them both. "But is this really what you want? A spur of the moment wedding in a strange land with no family and no friends, that probably isn't legal anyway?"

She shrugged. "I just want to be your wife. I want to let go of the pain and the hurt of the past and move forward with you."

Smiling again, Dylan caressed her face. "I want that, too."


	5. v

**Author's note: **This has really become my favorite story. I hope you enjoyed reading it just as much as I enjoyed writing it. Wishing my friend a very happy birthday once more!

* * *

**Chapter V**

That morning had been cold. The coldest one they've had in the four days they've been there. Being that it was such a busy morning for the hotel staff with the ceremony in the evening, Brenda and Dylan went to breakfast in the dining room for the participating couples. Again, the room was filled with white flowers and accents of gold. She couldn't imagine it looking anymore beautiful than it did right now with the golden sunlight shining through the windows, giving that other-worldly glow to just about everything it hit.

The room buzzed with excitement; excited couples eager for the ceremony and the feast afterward. It was so loud that Brenda and Dylan could hardly hear each other. But the atmosphere was contagious. Many time throughout their delicious meal, they found themselves smiling and sharing looks of knowing.

They'd spent the afternoon in their room, laying in each others' arms. Until three-thirty when Brenda received the call that her dress was finished. She went to try it on and it fit like a dream. She was unsure how the changes she suggested would fit the style of dress, but the seamstress had some a wonderful job. She hurried to the salon to get her hair styled in the fashion that best complimented the dress.

Calling upstairs at four- forty five (fifteen minutes before the ceremony was to start) Brenda asked Dylan to meet her outside by the fountain on the property. She wanted a picture (which the hotel staff was more than happy to provide) to remember her wedding day.

Dylan stepped off the elevator just a few minutes later and headed outside. Even though it was warmer now than it had been, he still partially regretted not wearing a coat. He was certain, however, that neither he nor Brenda would like it if he was in their wedding picture wearing a parka.

The white suit fit him perfectly. Of course he had no doubt that it would, given that Brenda picked it out. He walked outside amidst other couples dressed in white who smiled to him and wished him well on his marriage. It took him a moment to find Brenda out of all the brides but when he did, all of the air was pushed out of his lungs at the sight of her.

She wore a white fur cloak with a hood, but it was opened and he could see the lace dress she'd chosen for herself. The closer he stepped to her (no easy feat when his legs felt weighted down), he could see that it held an intricate design on the bodice. The same design was on the sleeves that peeked out from underneath the cloak. The fabric was pulled tightly against her arms and held in place by the finger holds. Specks of gold were sewn into the dress that fell just below her knees and the setting sun caught them all, giving Brenda a glow. The shape of the dress fit her body perfectly. It was tasteful and suited just to her. It reminded him of a Gothic Victorian gown that had been adapted to look more modern.

The crown of her hair was twisted in several rows, tied together in a long plat down the back, while the rest of her hair hung down to her shoulders in curls. Little specks of baby's breath flowers were entwined in the twists on the top of her head. White, laced up boots with golden accents completed the look.

Dylan was certain he'd never seen a more beautiful and breathtaking sight in all of his life. And the snow capped fountain behind her, with the sun setting directly behind that only added to that.

When he reached her, his heart was thundering in his chest. Something primal and protective swirled around inside of him when he reached for her hands. There was hardly any make up on her beautiful face, he noticed. And she looked happier than he had ever seen her.

"You look stunning," he told her, his mouth going dry.

"You don't look so bad yourself, handsome." She reached out and toyed with the tie. Then chided herself and smooth it out for their picture. "I think we have to hurry, they're going to be starting soon."

Dylan nodded, unable to form words at the moment, or tear his eyes away from her.

When one of the staff posed them for their picture, he too, must have known Dylan would have a hard time tearing his eyes away, because he posed them facing each other. One of Brenda's hands was around his shoulder, his are the same side around her waist, holding her close, while their free hands were clasped together between them. With her head tilted up and his down, they stared into each others' eyes lovingly as the photographer took their picture…careful to get the setting sun behind them

Not a moment after the flash went off, they were ushered inside for the ceremony. The couples were lined together in the dining room (even more beautiful with the golden lights handing from the ceiling). Six couples on each row of the three rows. Both Brenda and Dylan imagined that if the weather permitted and there were more couples participating, they would have held this outside.

The magistrate who was to preside over the ceremony took his place atop the makeshift stage at the far end of the room. Then, instructed the couples to turn and face each other.

Brenda and Dylan face each other with wide smiles.

"We have come together here in celebration of the joining together of these brides and these grooms." The magistrate began in a booming voice. "There are many things to say about marriage. Much wisdom concerning the joining together of two souls has come our way through all paths of belief, and from many cultures. With each union, more knowledge is gained and more wisdom gathered. Though we are unable to give all this knowledge to these who stand before us, we can hope to leave with them the knowledge of love and its strengths and the anticipation of the wisdom that comes with time."

Quiet filled the room.

"The law of life is love unto all beings. Without love, life is nothing, without love, death has no redemption. Love is anterior to Life, posterior to Death, initial of Creation and the exponent of Earth. If we learn no more in life, let it be this."

Those words seemed to have been spoken directly to the two of them.

"Marriage is a bond to be entered into only after considerable thought and reflection," the magistrate continued. "As with any aspect of life, it has its cycles, its ups and its downs, its trials and its triumphs. With full understanding of this, these Grooms and Brides have come here today to be joined as one in marriage."

Brenda smiled and Dylan smiled back.

"Others would ask, at this time, who gives the bride in marriage, but, as a woman is not property to be bought and sold, given and taken, I ask simply if she comes of her own will. Bride, is it true that you come of your own free will and accord?"

"Yes, it is true," Brenda replied with the other brides. The chorus of their voiced filled the room.

"Please join hands with your betrothed and listen to that which I am about to say. Above you are the stars, below you are the stones, as time doth pass, remember... Like a stone should your love be firm like a star should your love be constant. Let the powers of the mind and of the intellect guide you in your marriage, let the strength of your wills bind you together, let the power of love and desire make you happy, and the strength of your dedication make you inseparable. Be close, but not too close. Possess one another, yet be understanding. Have patience with one another, for storms will come, but they will pass quickly."

"Be free in giving affection and warmth. Have no fear and let not the ways of the unenlightened give you unease, for God is with you always."

Dylan wiped the tears that fell from his beloved's eyes, aware that his own were slipping down.

"Groom, I have not the right to bind thee to Bride, only you have this right. If it be your wish, say so at this time and place your ring in her hand."

"It is my wish," Dylan answered with the other grooms. He pulled his ring out of his pocket and placed it in her hand.

"Bride, I have not the right to bind thee to Groom only you have this right. If it be your wish, say so at this time and place your ring in his hand."

"It is my wish," Brenda said with tears before reaching into his other pocket and placed her ring in his upturned palm.

"Groom, if it be your wish for Bride to be bound to you, place the ring on her finger and repeat after me: I take thee to my hand, my heart, and my spirit, to be my chosen one. To desire thee and be desired by thee, to possess thee, and be possessed by thee, without sin or shame, for naught can exist in the purity of my love for thee. I promise to love thee wholly and completely without restraint, in sickness and in health, in plenty and in poverty, in life and beyond, where we shall meet, remember, and love again. I shall not seek to change thee in any way. I shall respect thee, thy beliefs, thy people, and thy ways as I respect myself.

Dylan looked more serious than she'd ever seen as she said the words and placed the ring on her hand. When it was her turn, she did so just as reverently. The weight of what they were saying to one other striking chords deep within them both.

So engrossed in one another neither of them saw the hotel staff passing out golden chalices and little pieces of cakes until it was their turn to receive them.

Once the staff had finished, the magistrate began again. "May you drink your fill from the cup of love."

Dylan held out the chalice carefully to Brenda while she drank half of the warm apple cider. She smiled and laughed to herself while Dylan finished the rest. On the magistrate's instructions, she held out the tiny piece of vanilla cake to him as he bit half and then she ate the other.

Excitement began to flow throughout the room, and they figured the ceremony was coming to a close. The staff came through quickly to take the chalices away.

"By the power vested in me, I now pronounce you husband and wife. May your love so endure that its flame remains a guiding light unto you."

The brides and grooms around them shouted with joy and kissed. Dylan swept Brenda up into his arms and placed a sweet, reverent kiss to her lips.

"Best vacation ever!" Brenda exclaimed with glee.

* * *

They decided not to participate in the feast the hotel provided. Instead, retired to their room for some time alone on their wedding night. The staff was providing room service again and they ordered what was being served downstairs.

Curled up against his side as they lay in bed, Brenda wondered, "Do you want to go down to city hall and make it legal tomorrow or wait until we get back to London?"

Half asleep, Dylan sighed and ran a finger lazily down her bare arm. "We could, if that's what you want."

Brenda thought for a moment. "I would imagine that we weren't the only couple who didn't have a license to participate in the ceremony. City hall might be swamped."

"Maybe. We can wait if you want." He turned into her and dropped a kiss on the top of her head. "I don't think it matters to us right now if it's legal or not. You're my wife in every way that counts and I'm your husband."

Already decided that they would go to city hall because she wanted to make her marriage to Dylan legal as soon as possible, Brenda nodded. "Yes, you are my not legal but spiritual husband, Dylan McKay."

Pulling her up until she was practically laying on top of him, Dylan asked. "So, was this anything like you pictured our wedding to be, my not legal but spiritual wife?" His fingers searched under the covers for the hem of the nightgown she wore, aching to bare her flesh before him.

Pulling the nightgown off of her, she straddled him naked before leaning down to press a sweet kiss to his lips.

"Just like a fairytale," she whispered before proceeding to make love to her husband on their wedding night.

**End**


End file.
